Feeling the fear and doing it anyway

I started a job application this evening which I found quite difficult to do. As I am in a reflective mood, I had a think about what was really bothering me about the application. I realised that it was not the tedium of doing the form, but the potential change I was welcoming into my life that was making me feel very uncomfortable. I detest change, hence I am stuck in a rut in several areas of my life. I googled ‘fear of change’ and read several articles which illustrated that fear of change is actually fear of being criticised, of success and so on. I continued reading until I came across a New Year’s resolution worksheet, where you plan to start your resolution in February. I recognised some of the methods in the worksheet and decided to apply it to my goal of going to Brazil:

GOAL: I want to go to Brazil in September 2012.

WHY: I want to go to see this country which really interests me and to challenge one of my biggest fears.

HOW TO STAY STRONG: I will remind myself of this by putting up lots of fun and interesting pictures of Brazil in places where I can see them; and by doing lots of research.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF I DON’T ACHIEVE THIS GOAL: If I don’t go, I will be stuck in the UK, not having any new, life changing experiences; listening and reading about others adventures. I also will not have given myself the best gift ever for my 30thbirthday!

THE ACTIONS I NEED TO TAKE:

  • Save at least £1250 to pay for my airfare and spending money
  • Register with Workaway in February and start applying for placements
  • Start learning Portuguese.

MY NEXT STEP: To collect language resources from Mike.

WHO DO I HAVE TO BE TO DO THIS GOAL: Strong in my purpose, willing to take a risk and more importantly willing to embrace change.

HOW WILL I CREATE ACCOUNTABILITY: I will tell even more people about wanting to go to Brazil; and when I feel more confident, by May I will tell my work. I am creating further accountability by posting this here where I know Hattie and Keith will read it. Please use this position of authority!
I hope that I manage to achieve this goal and recommend that anyone that wants to achieve something use the worksheet as I did; it prompted me to remember why I want to go to Brazil.
Thankfulness today: I am incredibly thankful for Danielle’s generosity. As a Christmas present she bought me a morning in a beauty salon in Chingford, my nails are done a fabulous orange, my toes a sultry carmine and my tense shoulders eased and rubbed
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